This blog is simply the story about my little life
with my sweet family that the Lord has blessed me with
and the day in, day out things that we do.
It basically is my online diary/photo album of our life.
I'm glad you're here!
~~~o0o~~~

Wednesday, October 12, 2016

Can't sleep...

 It's 2:17 am and I'm in my kitchen taking photos for my blog.


INSOMNIA.

Insomnia is a new thing for me. It started about 3 years ago and I HATE it!
 It can start at any time of the night, but usually starts about midnight or 1:00 am with me stirring and rolling over. Then the brain starts up and the mind starts racing. Thoughts pop into my mind. I start thinking and then my thinking leads to worry and worry leads to fear. It's usually about my children. I immediately start praying. I continue to lay there wide awake. I try to make myself think happy thoughts and I start thanking God for all of my blessings, but alas, I lay there wide awake. I tell myself to stop thinking, relax, go back to sleep, but sleep wont come. I fight this battle for about an hour and then I finally get out of bed.
 I head to the kitchen and get a glass of milk.
Sometimes I read my Bible, sometimes I get on the computer and look at my photos, Facebook or Pinterest, sometimes I read a book and sometimes I get on my knees and pray. On this particular night I started reading a new book called, "Having a Mary heart in a Martha World"
 Sometimes I take a 1/4 dose of Tylenol PM (the bottle says to take two pills and I take half of one). I don't like to take it in the middle of the night in fear of being too sleepy and groggy in the morning, but this particular night I felt like I needed to take it.

Having insomnia is very unpleasant and it leads to fear of having it again the next night. My pattern is that I have one sleepless night, so then the next night I take 1/4 dose of the sleep med and I will take it for several days in a row until I think I will sleep again. During the stress I have been under the past three years, I believe I took the sleep med every night for a good solid year. I am happy that I have cut back to just randomly taking it.
I have researched insomnia and it does go hand in hand with menopause, and the timing for it would be accurate in my case (starting 3 years ago). However, I do know the root of a lot of my sleepless nights is worry for my sons, my daughter-in-laws and my grandson.  I know worrying is wrong. Worrying means I am not trusting God. My kids are God's children and I know He has a plan for them, but these worries sneak up on me in the middle of the night and wake me up.
I actually have placed comforting scriptures of God's promises by my bed to help me.
 "For I the Lord thy God will hold thy right hand, saying unto thee, fear not! I will help thee." Isaiah 41:13

"For God hath not given us the spirit of fear, but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind." II Timothy 1:7

"Cast all your cares upon Him; for He careth for you." I Peter 5:7
 I also believe that sometimes God wakes me up just so that I will pray for my loved ones. Sometimes the urge is so strong that I feel like it can be spiritual battle and I want to be obedient and pray for the person/situation that God has placed on my heart.
 Tonight I prayed and read some of my book. This is a good book. I want to love Jesus like Mary did and be at His feet listening to His teachings with a humble and sincere heart.
 Well, I finished my milk and I'm getting drowsy.
It's only 2:41, so if I can get to sleep now, I will still get 3 more hours of sleep before the alarm goes off. I'm going back to bed. Goodnight!


"When thy liest down, though shalt not be afraid; ye shall lie down, and thy sleep shall be sweet." Proverbs 3:24

8 comments:

gin said...

So sorry about your insomnia. It's overwhelming to have the load of care and concern of your family always on your mind. But we mommas are like that. Your family is fortunate to have you lifting them up in prayers continuously. There's nothing wrong with that. And they are sound asleep while you as their angel interceding in prayer to our Heavenly Father for their well-being. You are an awesome mom!!

Kathi said...

I'm sorry you could not sleep. I agree that it must be a menopause symptom. I get it too and I do what you do. God is so close to us, especially when we look to Him with our troubles. God probably does wake us so that we will pray. You are doing the right thing. God knows your worries over your kids. He will meet your need. Love you sister.

as always starzie said...

Hi Sharon, I totally understand. I've gotten in the habit of going to bed too late because I'm not tired. I also worry about lots of things. I just got home from a month in the hospital and re-hab due to a severe broken leg. I also have a family issue that's been very heartbreaking. Life can be very challenging. I have a wooden plaque that says,"Let your faith be bigger than your fear"! We just need to know everything happens for a reason and to count our blessings. Tomorrow will be a better day! And I take Zquill to help fall asleep. It really works.
Take care. You will be in my thoughts and prayers!
Hugs from Darlene

Cottonwood Tales said...

Sharon - I totally understand the sleepless nights - - since my husband passed away unexpectedly over 15 months ago, I wake up many nights and cant go back to sleep. It will catch up with me and then I will get one good night's sleep out of 3 or 4 days of sleepless nights. I also worry and stress about our two sons (one is a Policeman) and the other travels for his job. I too remind myself constantly that God does not approve of all my worrying and just to trust Him. Hugs to you.
Karen in Texas

Jan said...

Oh my goodness, I can relate! I've never been a good sleeper but it seems that the older I get, the wackier my sleeping habits have become. I find that I do best when I keep a strict schedule, I can't sleep in on lazy days, I can't stay up too late when I'm tempted.

When I was young, my mother would make me a cup of warm milk with a touch of butter and a sprinkle of nutmeg. I don't know if it helped me sleep, but I still indulge...

Shan said...

Sharon,

This sounds so familiar!! Sending a prayer that you find rest and comfort.

Kindredly,
Shan
Honey Hill Farm

Judy said...

I can so relate with dealing with insomnia. I usually toss and turn but I think I will get up next time it happens maybe that would be better than tossing and turning.

Kelly M. said...

Oh my these are my nights as well! I find my best prayer time is then, I often feel led to pray for my son ( he's 21 ) that he is making wise choices and calling out to God for guidance and decision making. I read the book over and over Power of the Praying Parent. I recall both of us reading that book at the same time one year!

((hugs))
kelly~

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